LovePost #9 losing integrity with every apology #OdiliaRiveraSantos

Every one of us has triggers, which make us do stupid things. Stupid is a valid word for this, most of the time -- unless you commit a crime in which case, you'd say a trigger made you antisocial. For the purposes of this blurb, I'll focus on the stupid, not the criminal.

Everyone had a childhood with its mixed bag of delightful and not so delightful events, and although we may delete the file, the patterns may persist.

Certain events, words or even a tone of voice can get you off track and back into the familiar pattern you've sworn to never live by again. 

Apologies abound.

It's easy to apologize and it can feel so grandiose. .. Like handing someone a bouquet of heirloom roses. Apologies, however, will not necessarily expunge your record in another's eyes -- especially if you've apologized for the same thing many times. 

How can you keep doing stupid stuff so you don't have to keep apologizing?

Silence is a good thing

Watch the trigger and let it roam around your mind.

Shut up and listen and remind yourself what year it is.

You may want to list situations, personality types, actions and words that trigger a stupid action on your part, ruminate, and destroy the evidence and impulse.

Integrity in a relationship increases as your apologies decrease. In love, be as kind in words as you are in actions and be generous with your admiration.

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